Fiddle-fiddle-dee.

In the walls of my apartment, hidden away where no one can see or go, there lives a Gnome. I don't know how long he has spent roaming the cracks and secret places of my ten storey building - all I know is that he is there.

He's a harmless old Gnome, no name, no family, no real purpose. He sports bright blue leggings with a bib that covers his chest, which in turn is clothed in a vibrant yellow tunic with three wooden buttons at the neck. He plays the fiddle and whistles to himself late in the night when everyone is safe, sound, and tucked away.

Fiddle-fiddle-dee-diddle-dee-diddle do...

ya. The neighbors really oughta turn down their folk music. Its embarrassing. O_o

Blogger Beta...

wont let users who have already switched over post comments on Blogs that have not yet switched. So until that is fixed (and it is apparently being looked into) no one can blog cool shit until I am able to properly comment on it.

That is all.

I'm gonna say it...and nobody can stop me!

Snakes On A Plane looks like the stupidest pile of crap that will have ever graced the silver screen. It's right up there with Anaconda! The whole thing reeks of failure, and no matter what anyone says, this move looks like shit!

Sam Jackson...you're a hack, and this movie looks awful. I know the cool internet thing to do right now is to wander around online communities and proclaim how much this film is going to kick ass...but I just cant do it.

BOO!! Down with Snakes On A Plane. What the hell is wrong with people...!?

There. You may now taunt and ridicule me, but it ain't going to change my outlook on the crap-fest that is and will be Snakes On A Plane. I have taken my stand, and by golly it feels damn fine.

Were I a Troll.

I would ROAR, and rattle your door, I would bellow and shake my fists, were I a Troll. Lurking in the dark, where the mildew rots and the crawly bugs scamper I would wait...were I a Troll.

Coarse, tangled, fetid hair would hang from my back, and sprout from places that no god (living or dead) ever intended. I would glory in my strength, and bang my fists against the earth, were I a Troll.

I would not, however, sit through the new Beowulf and Grendel movie ever again - Even were you to promise me...That yes, I too could be a Troll.

How sad. And even worse, how disappointing. Not a total bomb in entertainment history, but far from a success either.

I knew we should have gone to see The Libertine, instead.

Icky...

Well, I'm sad to report that the film Doogal (that I just talked about in the last blog entry) sucked a whole lot of monkey wang.

The trailer that i posted below made it look pretty damn entertaining...I dont get it. It completely fell flat on its face.

Fraking Hollywood.

However, on a happier note, I'm eating a pretty awesome chocolate strawberry cheesecake right now...so there is a silver lining.

How many security wrappers do we really need?

Why Why Why...?

Why must they make DVD's impossible to get into? How many security wrappers do we really need? By the time I get the damn stickers off I have somehow managed to mar the surface of the cover plastic...Thusly in my eyes degrading the cover art!

Am I anal? Or am I just a simple man that desires to come home after buying a new movie and not having to wrestle with the damn thing for ten minutes just to get it open.

I have a dream! A dream that one day has us all living in a glorious free world. A world devoid of evil DVD wrappers and tricksy stickers...a world that allows all of humankind the luxury of easy to open movie cases.

*insert applause here*